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Spousal Infidelity

Does your spouse fit the profile?

Any successful relationship is built upon a foundation of respect and trust. If either of these principals are missing, damaged or in question, the relationship is heading for serious trouble. While absolute evidence is not always immediately available, often, a 'gut feeling' is the first indication of a cheating partner.

If you're reading this web page, chances are that you're suspicious that your partner may be cheating on you, or someone that you care about has suspicions that they're the victim of a cheating partner. Statistics indicate that well in excess of 50% of men are unfaithful to their partner, and indications are that just as many women engage in cheating behavior. Signs to look for:

  • Is your spouse or partner spending a lot more time away from home-on business trips, at meetings, nights out with the boys or girls? Are lunch hours very leisurely?
  • Is he or she going to work earlier and coming home later? When you call, does the office have trouble tracking your mate down?
  • Do sales conferences or evening classes seem to last longer than they used to?
  • When at home, is your mate restless? Does he/she suddenly spend an extraordinary amount of time doing "good deeds," as if to make up for guilt?

Cheating, previously thought to be almost exclusively a male dominated area, now includes approximately as many women as men. That's right... women approximately the same percentage of women cheat on their partners. Some recent studies have strongly suggested that women on average have more episodes of infidelity than men!

And with the availability of Internet 'singles' dating sites, there is a higher and higher percentage of married or otherwise 'involved' individuals who are posing as 'singles', not to mention the web sites specifically dedicated to discreet sexual encounters outside of an individual's marriage or other 'primary' relationship.

Based upon our past experiences, approximately 80% to 90% of woman and 60% to 70% of men who experience feelings that their partner is cheating, are correct. Taken collectively, indications over a long period of time make the likelihood of a cheating partner more obvious, but the first small clues are seldom so obvious.

Typically, it's a gut feeling that something is different that gets an individual thinking they might be with a cheater. You might notice minor changes in your partner's behavior, speech patterns, activities, appearance, or attitude. You might notice small things that seem to make your partner nervous when discussed.

Even the most skilled cheater can't completely conceal these clues, and only an individual who is suffering from total denial is likely to miss these clues altogether. Initially, these small signs can be misinterpreted as being harmless, but eventually they begin to appear more obvious and blatant.

Although every case is different, there are numerous common signs that your domestic partner may be engaged in another 'secret' relationship. Often, the other person may not even be aware of the existence of the relationship that you share with this partner.

Of course, in some instances, the other person is aware of the existence of your relationship, and simply either doesn't care, is actually 'turned on' by the risk, or has dreams of replacing the cheater's legitimate partner (YOU!). Often, the 'other man' or 'other woman' is a close friend of the cheater's legitimate partner (YOU!).

Although it is quite common for people have friends of the opposite sex, there is certainly a difference between being 'friends', and being 'lovers'. Although there are times when a partner can misinterpret 'signals' and become suspicious for no reason, there are also unmistakable indications of a relationship that is having problems.

One of the most striking examples of a serious problem in a relationship, is when one partner lies to the other. Although these lies may involve what appears on the surface to be small and insignificant matters, lies that are told to cover seemingly small and insignificant items are more often than not connected to other larger and far more significant issues.

Consider the odds that a partner would lie about spending time with a friend of the same sex. It is very uncommon for a partner in a relationship to feel the need to lie about "spending time with the guys/gals." On the other hand, a partner will lie in virtually 100% of those cases in which that partner is cheating.

Cheating partners turn to many sources for companionship, including a co-worker, supervisor or employee, a neighbor, former romantic partner, a friend or relative of their normal partner (YOU!), a business associate, professional client or patient, escort service or prostitute, someone met in an Internet chat room, or any other person met elsewhere outside the home.

Copyright © 2004 Charles Hess Investigations, Detective Agency - Maryland
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